


Communication works for those who work on it

by LoenaAdams



Category: WTFock | Skam (Belgium)
Genre: Communication, Domestic Boyfriends, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Sobbe - Freeform, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, mention hate crime, wtfock - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-02 16:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24020149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoenaAdams/pseuds/LoenaAdams
Summary: Sander turns Robbe's face towards him so he can directly look in the most gorgeous brown eyes. 'You are the strongest person I know. Remember what you told me? Asking for help is not weakness, it is very brave because you acknowledge that you need help and that is nothing to be ashamed of. You can't handle everything on your own and even if you can doesn't mean you should.'Robbe & Sander finally talk about everything that happened at the beginning of their relationship, learning once again how important communication is.
Relationships: Sander Driesen/Robbe IJzermans
Kudos: 87





	Communication works for those who work on it

At first, Sander didn't have a clue. He didn't realise that his boyfriend was still heavily affected by the attack. Their relationship had started rocky so, in the beginning, Sander couldn't really tell when Robbe was pretending or lying about something. 

The first time Sander tried to take him back to the bar in the first week of January, Robbe told him he felt like eating fries so they went to another place instead. 

The second time Robbe told him that he couldn't meet up at the bar because of homework. Sander should just come to his boyfriend's house and chill there. 

The third time is when Sander started to noticed things. It was a Friday evening and they just went to the cinema because it was only 9 pm they didn't feel like going home yet. So they decided they would go for a drink. Robbe was very happy that evening, in two week time he had a spring break and he kept teasing Sander who wouldn't have this break. Sander reminded him that he fewer classes then Robbe and he could choose if he wanted to go or not.  
They walked through Antwerp together, hand in hand, laughing. 

But at some point, Robbe probably realised where they were going and he kept slowing down. Tieing his shoelaces, stopped to show Sander a picture on his phone, asking if they were going the right way at every corner, letting go of Sander's hand. 

'Robbe come on now' laughed Sander when his boyfriend stopped again, this time to show him the place where he had once bought a perfume for his mother. It wasn't even a 10-minute walk and they were already 25 minutes on their way. 

'Euhh Sander maybe we should go to your place. I am feeling kinda tired.' Robbe didn't really look him in the eye and over the week's Sander noticed that means that Robbe was either embarrassed or incredibly shy.  
'What do you mean you weren't tired five minutes ago.' Sander was confused because he had seen tired Robbe and this one didn't even come close. The opposite actually. 

'Just feel like touching you in ways that are not appropriate in public.'

Sander snorts, 'oke then let's go home.'

The fourth time was when it finally clicked. This time Robbe didn't have an excuse. They were going to drink something with some of Sander's friends. Sander noticed that his boyfriend was nervous which was strange because he had met Sander's friends before and they got along quite well. Especially the girls were very fond of him. Robbe was trying again to buy time but it didn't really work. How closer the got to the café how more sweaty his hand palm became and how paler his face.  
'Are you oke cutie?'

Robbe licked his lips nervously. 'I don't feel so good Sander maybe I should go home. I will talk to you tomorrow?' Sander who couldn't keep up with the quick change of events, nodded. 'See you tomorrow, get some rest. Text me when you get home please.' He tried kissing his boyfriends on the lips but Robbe turned his head.  
Now Sander was hundred percent sure something was wrong. He just couldn't figure out what. 

An hour later he was chatting to Lynn, a friend from his photography class. She was very disappointed that Robbe wasn't with him. 'What was wrong with him then?'  
'I don't know, he was fine during dinner but when walked over here he-'

His blood started to rush through his veins. That couldn't be true, Robbe would never let those assholes win like that, Robbe was way stronger than that, but how more he thought about it, how more sense it made. They had never really talked about the attack. He didn't know how Robbe felt about it. He had never asked. He had been so busy with his problems that he completely forgot about the possibility that Robbe felt different about it.  
Sander got scared at first too but he quickly realised that he would never give up. He was proud of his sexuality and he shouldn't have to hide it.

But he knew that wasn't the case for Robbe. Although Robbe had grown a lot in being comfortable with his sexuality he still had a long way to go.  
It was typical for Robbe. Avoiding the problem by changing his own behaviour. 

Sanders mutters a quick goodbye to Lynn who looks confused. He promises that he would text her later and that he was now heading to his boyfriend.

Sander walks quickly back to the restaurant where he had put his bike earlier this evening. He thought back at every time Robbe had acting strange around this place. He felt incredibly stupid for not connecting the dots sooner. 

At Robbe's house, everything was already dark. Sander pulled his phone out of his pocket to check if his boyfriend was still awake.

-Are you still awake?-

Het got almost immediately a response 

-yes, still awake- 

-I am at your house, please open the door- 

He waited impatiently for Robbe to unlock the door.  
'Hey, come in my mother is already asleep so we have to be quiet.'  
The walked through to the hallway, towards the dark living room where Sander took place on the sofa. 

Robbe puts on a small light. 'Do you want a drink or anything?' 

Sander shook his head and reached out for Robbe so he would sit next to him. 'How are you feeling? You look a lot better.' Sander failed to make it sound concerned, is sounded accusing.  
Robbe swallowed and a blush starts to creep up around his neck. He was clearly stressed.  
'Yeah feeling better, don't know what happened then. Did you have fun with your friends?'

Suddenly Sander felt extremely angry. 'Why are you lying Robbe? You know damn well what happened back there.'

Robbe's mouth opens and closes again, his hand are slightly trembling. 

'I can't believe you let those assholes win like that. After everything that has happened, you walk away so easily. Lying straight to my face Robbe! you can't just avoid everything because you are scared!'

Sander tries to take a deep breath. He can't explain why he is so mad. He hates the fact that Robbe lied to him and he is also mad at those dudes who made Robbe feel this way.

His boyfriend isn't looking him in the eyes, playing nervously with his hand. 'Sorry'

Sander takes a good look at his stressed boyfriend and he feels bad. He takes a deep breath. 'I am sorry too, I shouldn't talk to you that way. I just got mad and wasn't thinking clearly.'

Robbe finally looks him in the eyes, his eyes are kind of glassy. 'Why did you go back to Britt after the att- thing?'

'What do you mean I never went back to Britt.' Sander licks his lips nervously. He doesn't like this conversation.  
'Sander I saw it myself-'  
'Do you mean that one insta post? I told you that she didn't get that we had broken up.'

'I saw you two kissing at the party from Noor's school.' 

Sander doesn't know what to say. 'You saw me kissing with Britt and you still took me back?' 

Robbe let out a sigh. 'It was a very confusing time. Milan told me about guys in straight relationships who would meet up with gay guys for a quick hookup.'

'You thought I used you for a quick hook up?' 

'Sander I didn't understand shit! You forgave me so easily for all that bullshit I told you! The next thing I know is that you absolutely didn't want to go to the police after the attack, then you tell me you love me and that is the only thing that matters and not even twelve hours later you are sticking your tongue in your what you told me was your ex-girlfriend!'

Sander was speechless because he really did that, didn't he?

'And you kept texting me random stuff. Then I saw you in that café acting like nothing was wrong and I was sure you were one of those dudes who just wanted to use me but then you painted that damn mural and I understood nothing because why would you put so much effort in something that was just a hookup?'

Robbe has tears in his eyes. Sander tries to takes his hand but Robbe pulls it back and lets out a frustrated groan. 

'I guess I own you an explanation.' Sanders says after a long silence

Robbe looks up. 'You guess?' 

Sander swallows, 'Robbe I am sorry, I never realised how you must have felt. I was so busy with myself and I am not good at talking about stuff like this. I am really sorry.'

Robbe makes a huffed sound. 'That is not an explanation.'

'I know, I know. I did really broke up with Britt after we first kissed but she didn't take me seriously. We had an on-off relationship, I always came back to her because she was safe. I knew she loved me in her own way and I thought she would be the only person who could truly love me with my fucked up brain.'

Robbe opens his mouth to interrupt him but Sander stops him. 

'Please let me talk, it is easier in one go.'

Sander takes a deep breath. 'I was very upset after you blocked me and told me all those things, but I was already in love with you. When you told me about Chernobyl I understood you. I know how it feels to have chaos in your brain and you just looked so adorable. I just couldn't stay mad at you.  
After the attack, I got scared but probably not for the same reason as you. I hated the fact that you got hurt through me, I couldn't stop thinking that if I hadn't been there you wouldn't have been hurt.’

'Sander you know that it was not your fault. If I hadn't been there you also wouldn't have gotten hurt.'

'I know but my brain just, I don't know. After the attack, I went home and Britt was in my room. She was waiting for me because I hadn't responded to her text messages. She demanded I told her what was going on and why I had a black eye. So I told her everything. I told her that I fell in love with somebody else, a guy. I didn't tell her it was you because you were still in the closet but she connected the dots. She realised that you had broken up with Noor because of me. She just got into my head, telling me she was the only one who understood me, that you weren't capable of dealing with me. That if you found out be being bipolar that you couldn't deal with because you had already too much going on.  
Stuff like that. I just got scared and didn't know what to do, so I choose the easy way, accepting Britt back into my life. Let her take care of me. Then you wanted to go to the police and I just got terrified that you would find out that I was bipolar and that you leave me.  
I am not a stranger to the police, they have picked me up before during an episode.  
So I just wanted to shush you, making sure you were alright and I had to let you know I loved you.'

Tears rolled down over Sander's cheeks because he still feels the fear of losing the younger boy. Robbe slowly crawls towards Sander and puts his arms around him. 'Sander you know I love you right? I don't care that you are bipolar. I love you for who you are and everything that comes with it.'

'It felt wrong to be with Britt but I just didn't want to be alone and you stopped responding to my messages. I thought you found out that I was bipolar or that you realised that being with me was dangerous. It never came to my mind that you knew I was still seeing Britt.  
When I saw you at that cafe, I was so happy. Seeing your face just gives me hope but you were mad at me.  
I realised you weren't mad at me because of things I thought at first but because I wasn't there for you. You were doubting my intentions and that just made me miserable. So I needed to do something, convincing you that everything I told you was true.'

'So you painted a huge mural of my face?' 

'I didn't know how to reach out to you in normal language, so I decided to it in my language. That way I could express my feelings for you.'

Sander looks at Robbe and brushes a curl out of his face. Robbe kisses him on his cheek. They sit in silence for a while, wrapped in each other's arms. 

'But why didn't you respond to my messages?' Robbe sounds determined to figure everything out. 

'I don't know. I just had a fight with Britt about the mural. She was convinced I was manic and threatened to tell my parents everything. I told her that I never wanted to see her again and that she could fuck off, so she told my parents.  
My mother tried to talk to me but I didn't want to talk. I just sat in my room for days, drawing your face most of the time. I couldn't help myself but stalking your Instagram. I needed to let you know I still thought of you so I liked some of your posts.  
When you texted me the next day, I directly came to your house. I knew this was my last chance with you.'

'Ik zie u graag Sander. I don't think you realise how you mean to me. You have helped me with so many things-'

'Then why have you never talked about the fact that you are still affected by the attack? You could have told me you didn't want to go there but you just made excuses.'

Robbe shakes his head and starts biting his fingernails. 'I don't know'  
Sander takes Robbe's hand from his mouth en starts to stroke it lightly. 'I don't know how to talk about it.' 

'Just take your time.'

'I mean you have never seemed to have no problem with it so I guess I am being a little bit dramatic.'  
Sander sighs loud. 

'Robbe, you know that is bullshit. You have every right to be upset or scared and you know you can talk to me about everything. I am sorry that I lashed out on you but I just wish you would have told me. I could have helped you.' 

The next sentence is said so softly that Sander almost missed it.  
'I don't want you to think I can't handle anything like I am weak or something.' 

Sander turns Robbe's face towards him so he can directly look in the most gorgeous brown eyes. 'You are the strongest person I know. Remember what you told me? Asking for help is not weakness, it is very brave because you acknowledge that you need help and that is nothing to be ashamed of. You can't handle everything on your own and even if you can doesn't mean you should.'

Robbe gives him a small kiss. 'I love you.'

'I love you too cutie, you know we are a team right?'

Robbe shifts in Sander laps so that he is now straddling the older boy.  
'I know that.'

'Please don't be afraid to talk to me. I want to help you as you help me.'  
Robbe puts both his arms over Sander's shoulders and hides his face in the neck of the artist. 'You help me already with so much.' 

'It can never be enough.' 

They sit there for a while, enjoying each other warm, being in their own little bubble, making out a little. Until suddenly the big light goes on which scares the hell out of both boys. 'Boys it is three in the morning, what are doing?' Robbe mum stands in the doorway dressed in a bathrobe. 

She looks at them for a second and noticed Sander's red eyes and the way her son is sitting on his boyfriend lap. 'I will leave you two to it, but Sander if you stay, which I hope because I don't want you to be outside at this time, the door remains open!' 

'Of course mum, go back to sleep, we will go to sleep soon.'

When Inge is back upstairs the boys are starting to laugh softly. 'Do you think your mum knows?'

'Knows what?'

'That you are not so innocent as you pretend when you are around her.'

Robbe groans. 'I am not sure, she tried to talk about it with but I put an end to it quite quickly.'

'Wait your mother tried to have the sex talk with you? And you didn't tell me?'

'I didn't let her speak. I am still traumatized from Milan's talk and I doubt she can tell me more about that stuff than Milan can.'

'You don't know that maybe your mother is quite freaky in the bedroom.'  
Robbe slapped Sander softly 'Just stop with talking please.'  
'Make me.'  
'Sander I swear'

The older boy starts to laugh and ruffles through his boyfriend's hair. 'I love you Cutie.'

When they finally laid in bed Sander couldn't fall asleep. He kept thinking about their conversation. It was a lot to process and it was difficult to talk about it but he felt lighter. He had shared Robbe some of his most private and dark thoughts and the younger boy still loved him.  
He felt so blessed and happy that he could start crying again.  
He didn't know what he had done to deserve the boy but he was so thankful for it.  
Sander promised to himself that he would do anything in his power to protect his relationship with his beautiful boy.  
They both needed the work on their communication skills but that was okay. They had all the time in the world.  
Enjoying the warmth of his boyfriend on his chest, feeling at peace, Sander finally fell in a deep sleep filled with happy dreams.

**Author's Note:**

> If you notice any spelling or grammar mistake please let me know!


End file.
